True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
We left the bar in 2 bicycle cabs. It cost thirty bucks and they took us to the wrong hotel. When we finally made it to the right one we ended up in a room with three randos from alaska. Jammed out with them for like an hour. Those inuits are good guitar players
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Climbing through a window thats four feet off the ground isnt the easiest thing when youre high, trust me.
I will not remember tonight for the most part. This text will be evidence. You can and probably will use this against me.
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Better safe and shitfaced than hungover and in need of another surgery.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
After the "sex" was over I dressed as quickly as possible. And then he came over to me stark naked and embraced me. For over a minute. And all I could think was please get your penis off my dress.
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