i either just vomited on a lesbian or a small boy
Did you call me this morning? I was really drugged up and don't remember.
Have a good day. My vagina shrank.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
I looked at the bar tab this morning. The bartender added a $25 'customer asshole fee'. I have no grounds to dispute it.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
Dilemma. I'm out of wine and I can't put on clothes to go to the liquor store bc I just got spray tanned. If this isnt white girl problems I don't know what is.
Randomize
