i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
bhystjhitsjhtiajielrfrhaug
This is sufficient.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
I'm sorry I put you in the washing machine. I honestly thought you would fit.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
OK. i'm going to add "riddle me this, brodawg" to the list of things i'm never gonna say to my boss again while i'm high.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
That's too much drama for once a month dick... that's in-house dick drama only
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
can we fuck so we can live up to our nicknames for eachother?
Randomize
