This ginger kid smells like a queef popsicle
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
The great thing about skinny blondes is that they're all interchangeable.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
just used my amazon order history to figure out my anniversary. I am the most epic/shittiest bf ever...
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
it's like his dick is making a u-turn.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
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