this guy at work is bossing me around at work. He is 24 and still has highlights and spikes his hair.
You're getting bossed around by a 1999 Highschool Yearbook picture?
so either half this theatre is as stoned as me, or day daybreakers is hilarious
Actions speak louder than pants.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
shes trying to book us all flights to Ireland..I let her get mine and yours but stopped her when she tried booking the guy next to her at the library
Its gonna be a symphony of fucks
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
What a dumb baby whore.
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
I don't give a shit if she's homeless, if you're gunna live outside el pollo loco and act like a bitch I'm squirting you with my water bottle
Couldn't finish, so she gave me "the tap," and I had to leave the mound early. Nothing worse than the long walk back after the manager comes out and asks for the ball.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
First night of sleeping in the same bed, and she farted on me. I immediately excused myself and went home. Don't know if we're still together. Will update you.
He was 6'8" - I shit you not! He sat up in my bed and the ceiling fan got him right in the forehead.
And it only took a fake engagement ring, a condom and a bowl of weed
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