I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
Who wears a wallet chain?!
please come you make the beer taste better
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
She just dipped a dollar bill in her queso dip and almost ate it before I slapped it out of her hand, no more bar crawls..
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
You thought her boot was a stray dog in your house..
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Randomize
