He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
I'm going to get a baby outfit made and send it to her that says: "My husband fucked his subordinate and all I got was another baby".
i want to give my vagina back to god and say no thank you
She just used a chaser for red wine.
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Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
I just scratched behind my ear and found icing. Fuck you.
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
they sound like some classy girls.
Hey, I don't give them daddy issues, I just take advantage of it. The real bad guy here is American parenting.
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I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
I was going to do a cardio thing but then tacos.
Woke up in a hotel room with some random guy then walked over a mile to the bus stop where I laid down and waited on the bus. GREAT NIGHT
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
What was I even doing in 2010?! I feel like that's a question I should be able to type into the Facebook Search bar
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