Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
she keeps giving me cups of everbeer.. its everclear and beer mixed. i guess its blackout or backout time
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
I told him to keep his feelings in his pants because they're annoying and to just fuck me.
You were pouring Patron into the window of the squad car trying to get the police dog to drink it
So thats why that cop beat my ass?
Probably
Please tell me how I go from a guy with a coke problem to a cop. My own life doesn't even make sense to me anymore
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
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