You're boyfriend is farting in his sleep. The last one sounded like a threat.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I hope he doesn't find the chex mix when he takes my shirt off.
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
He cut part of his finger off. It was a consolation blow job.
they superglued a cigarette to my fingers...i think I need to quit smoking.
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
Everyone called me "Barf Vader".. And I lost your lightsaber.
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
