It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Def drinking wine from a 4 liter jug at 11 am. If i call you in 20 years talking about 12 steps, please trace is back to this moment.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
nothing says 'im willing to leave my comfort zone for you' like letting you choke me during sex
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Your children are clinging to me like my teets are full of bountiful milkiness. They're driving me nuts. I felt my uterus shrivel up.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
my favorite sex position is the one where no sex actually happens we just get really stoned and eat a lot and watch netflix in the dark
Randomize
