You just kept rubbing her head and repeating "I really like your head, I want your head..." over and over for like 10 minutes straight... And she didnt even stop you.
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
I just tried to text you by typing "whoa" into my contacts.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
her 18 year old son fed me pieces of a french roll like a pigeon, as I lay on the floor of the bathroom crying.
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
I woke up in a tow truck cuddling plan b. Can you pick me up?
Does your body have a liquid mass index? does that make sense? I think I drank it in Long islands.. Kill me now..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This feeling I'm having... is it love or a combination of alcoholism and unprotected rough sex
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
The memory of your penis haunts me. I must learn to be satisfied with lesser men than you.
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
What kind of terrible faithless God would allow vodka and one ply toilet paper to coexist?
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