Running into every girl no one would hook up with here at rick's. Typical.
..Thats also how I think I got the lyrics from MIAs Paper Planes Sharpeed on my ass? Maybe.
I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
MCAT status: Day 64, no longer can remember what sex is like.
Actually I think I might be dying right now so if I do you have to drink all my vodka
You're so demanding.
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
We found him sitting in a beach chair in the basement storage room passed out. Idk if we should move him or pass the bowl around.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just watched a guy get through airport security with a full bottle of captain morgan. In my head the entire airport cheered.
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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