Its a bunch of hippies dancing in front of a stobe light. For ten dollars I could have gone to the strip club and at least had a lap dance
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
I seriously don't understand how you keep getting laid.
Because I'm like the spider of false hope. I spin elaborate tales and snare them in my web of utter disappointment. They soon realize their mistake, but by then it's too late.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
So you are wearing a heart monitor while drinking?
Yea, they said carry on with my everyday activity.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
I just woke up ass naked on top of all my sheets, with no blinds in my room because i used them as togas, my back is killing me, im covered in sharpie, i have no memory of last night, and im pretty sure im still drunk. I consider the night a success
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize