i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
tonight would not even compare to the night i tried to pee in the living room
The iPhone is ruining my ability to sex message. My 5-year-old cousin just picked up my phone at my grandmas birthday party and read "I wanna stand you up and fuck you from behind" to my entire extended family bc of popped up on my screen
I put my bosses number in my phone as "Do not call," I shouldve known my drunk curiosity would overcome any desire I had to keep my job.
again?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sitting in room practicing taking shots. has my life come to this?
I am spending my work day planning my weekend drinking schedule
he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
I'll show rhose boucners: You don't let me in, I poop on your pool.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize