so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
you were holding her hair as she threw up saying "I'm going to be a great doctor" repeatedly.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
My neighbor caught me peeing on his rose bushes at 2 in the morning while wearing my Santa hat. My sex appeal has never been higher.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I'm pretty sure that I drunkenly used the phrase "I just want his beard all over my body" way too many times last night.
someone snapchatted me a porn of two guys dressed up as pterodactyls double teaming a girl
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Hey, it's Valentine's Day weekend and were single and off our periods. Let's live like queens.
I just want you to know that watching you throw up out of a cab in the McDonald's drive thru was probably the highlight of my night.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
as i was trying not to drunkingly fall off her toliet, i noticed her socks laying there. i quickly grabbed them, ran upstairs, and excitingly asked her if she had gotten them at sams club. she replied with, "...those are your socks."
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