I just ate an adderall and jelly sandwich in front of my mom. Homework time!
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
he told me it was because of the roids, but i couldn't tell if he meant ster or hem.
does my mom think that having an ed hardy lighter is going to get her laid?
legit been throwing up since 7am. told my parents the two bowls of puke in my dorm were soup
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
just had a very awkward conversation with the concierge at the hotel, they threw your underwear out
It's either gonna be a cock in my mouth or a burger. You decide which.
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Need to use your shower bro.
FWB wearing glitter again?
It’s like she’s marking her territory
Randomize
