she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
this just has baby written all over it
You stood in front of a yellow Camaro and kept yelling at it to "Transform already!!!!".. yeah, I'd say you were pretty wasted.
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
judging from the number of limes and box of kosher salt on the counter therell be 8.5 gallons of tequila drunk this weekend.
sounds about right
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
He said I was cute and he handed me a stuffed bear from his car. I don't care that he was 80, I named it Hector.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
Well would you like to come over anyway? I will be wearing sweatpants and disappointment. Also, I have Jack Daniels and I've managed to get drunk in under half an hour. But my boobs look awesome.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister