we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I hate cats. They're so curious, it's not their damn business.
Still drunk and leading the team through the 9am sales meeting. I'm pretty sure this is why there aren't more 26year-olds in management.
all i remember of last night is that i was drinking jameson and then NOTHING i do remember walking a dog though\nwhich is sooo fucking weird
OH MY GOD ITS COMING BACK I PUT THE DOG IN THE HOTTUB TOO
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left his apartment Bc I lost my id. Wandered 5 miles barefoot. Got lost in downtown la. My phone died so I asked for directions from a man at the gas station.. Turns out he was a bum. He led me back to the apartment AND he found my id.
It's like the whiskey god was watching over you
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
i just honestly didn't believe you when you said your brother was a fucking clown. ho shit you weren't kidding.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've entered the world of uncircumcised penises. It's disgusting.
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
True college students do jello shots in the library
imagine the bill from school house rock beating the shit outta you
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