Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
Also, just saw a kid in a gorilla costume being questioned by a boardwalk cop. I love ocean city.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
you were trying to convince me that you weren't drunk by grabbing my shoulders, looking deeply into my eyes and saying "i can see your sparkle"
The cab driver was nice enough to let you finish your beer in the car, but you crossed the line when you started to pee in the empty bottle
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
No Bryan wants to get drunk, rub inappropriate dudes legs, talk about my vagina and send me pics of his boomerang dick. That's not how you watch basketball.
That's how he does EVERYTHING!
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Why didn't we pregame for this?
Because it's breakfast!?!
you have 10 seconds to explain why the toilet is full of bread or its ALL GOING ON YOUR BED.
Randomize
