let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
I just answered "If only I knew" for a quiz in criminology, she loved it. I got an A
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
Tell him I thought his Superman stand on your bed and cum all over your back was quite funny
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
Why does fireball set life on fire? Your insides, your head, your behavior...
We found out if you get Ben high but stay sober yourself he is an AWESOME cook. You need to get your ass down here, this goes against everything I know to be real.
Well, I could just slap my dick to my phone and see what it says
I made a bucket list last night. Number 5: Will marry a wizard.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Randomize
