I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
MRIs the morning after St. Patty's Day was a poor choice.
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
The ONE weekend I don't put anything up my nose, and it decides to bleed like crazy
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was a "wash hands with dog shampoo" kind of night
Apparently I filled my purse with chicken nuggets and told my mom I was a "sexual squirrel."
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Randomize