Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
Because I chose to live vicariously through your uterus and you're letting me down right now.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize