Well apparently he's into motor boating.
gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
Well Im currently dressed up as batman raiding frat houses for booze
You threw an open can of pop at me while I was lying on the floor babbling and drooling about how I need to be alone forever, me and my leaking face.
I just had nipple jewelry returned to me in the law library.
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
First time for everything: started posting a Facebook comment, decided I'm not quite sober enough. Progress.
like, you weren't just lying there, you were wrapped in what appeared to be the skin of a wolf, chanting doomsday prophecies
THE END IS NEIGH
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
hey, just so we're clear, next time we go swimming drunk at my house, we have to use the floating chairs instead of my mattress. i'm not sure how to get it out of the pool.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
