Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
He made a fake guest pass that was just a note card with "I'm here. Me." written in sharpie, and tried to convince the security guard it was real.
So I vote that we skip the bowling and just go straight to destroying our livers.
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I'm eating chocolate cake while this guy snaps me from the gym. Like I cant believe i actually considered getting rid of this cake. Have fun sweating ima eat this cake 👌
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Psssh like you wouldn't lick BBQ sauce off my nipples.
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