are you so shy because you have an std?
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
Just told him about my threesome. if that doesn't make him want to date me nothing will.
I know you're trying to keep the moaning to a minimum but the banging on the wall is totally giving you away
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I SHOULD NOT BE HAVING AN EXISTENTIAL CRISIS OVER PIZZA
OHMYGOD YOU REALLY THINK I'D BE ON OPRAH?!
Randomize