My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
Can you imagine it being physically possible any other way unless the cows are unnaturally flexible
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I can never go back to Jacksonville. We think I may have punched a child in the face while on acid...
I spent the money she owed me on enough magnum condoms to make a blimp. Damn right I'm going to make the best of it.
No. Dude. I didn't knoe it eas floibg to move. It's slepprru ixuy!
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
I can show you the world. Shining, splimbering vaginaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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