If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
i think the next time he gets me off i'm going to scream bangarang
ru fi oooo
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
This girl just introduced herself as Queefer Sutherland. She's on a roller derby team. What. The. Fuck.
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I told him if he went to see magic mike with me I'd cover his eyes during the penis parts
Late night whataburger runs are great, except if you're the one that gets left black out drunk puking in the backyard drinking from the water hose
The best was when you were crying, and trying to get the bouncer to "understand you AS A HUMAN BEING"
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
WELL THEN WHAT DAY IS IT?!?! This whole having to choose between ruining my future and ruining my liver is totally killing my vibe
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
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