you know how you have to have just the right ratio of chips to sandwich? same goes for pubes.
this kid in class is playing minesweeper and just slammed the desk because he lost. thank god were normal.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I couldn't walk, so he carried me all the way home; and then I told him that I wasn't drunk enough to fuck him. Poor kid.
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
We talked about all of the sex positions that would better allow him to feed me grapes. I think I'm in love.
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
i woke up inside a girl that i promised i would take on a date to Chili's
I think putting on real pants was half my issue with today
it's a shower with the lights off kind of day
I really need to stop having sex.. I haven't been able to get a brush through the back of my hair for a good week and a half
she prefaced telling me she was pregnant with "houston, we have a problem"
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