I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
You were so drunk last night you thought you force pushed the automatic door open.
okay, this is the fifth time he asked if it was in yet. maybe i shouldn't have dated a blind guy.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
If im still in the bathroom puking when the sirens go off please distract the cops.
i seriously just licked my laptop for traces of blow from the other night
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
The cops are here to take me to jail, so I guess I have to go with them. If I'm not out by 6 p.m., there is some left-over lasagna in the fridge for you.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
i just remember doing it on a pile of clothes while i heard the muffled sound of his friend laughing. then i realized we were in a closet.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
Randomize
