yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
You wanted to speak to the manager of mcdonalds as to why a "bag of cheeseburgers" isn't a menu option.
i used the phrase horny rhinos in my paper. i hope my teacher appreciates the size of my balls
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I refrained from asking a guy what he spilled on his dick because it smelled good. Morals.
It's called being normal.
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
I'm eating hummus off of my stomach right now.
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
We showed up to the ER to pick him up and I was still wearing face paint from the game. Then I threw up in the sink. Those doctors did not like us at all.
My ovaries melted while we were talking. I almost told him I would suck his soul out through his dick
That would be a memorable parent teacher conference for sure
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