I feel like I just won at life, no connection sex and free 12 pack of beer after. Does life give out trophies, if so I want a big one.
Penelope Cruz needs to learn American words.
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
I feel like we're taking advantage of the fact that our R.A has cerebal palsey.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
is it consensual if they're cheered on by a room filled with 30 people?
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
No more Raisinettes before sex. That's what happened. I just put it together
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Apparently "I licked it so now it's mine" doesn't apply to people
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Last night i walked into a gas station to get condoms. I threw them on the counter and the guy gave me a funny look because i was wearing a bra under an open cardigan and no shoes. I screamed "DONT JUDGE ME!" and he gave them to me for free.
Randomize
