Why did u sent me a picture of a dead horse?
i could hear you having sex and was jealous, wanted to kill the mood
so she asked me if I thought she was fat and naturally I said no..... but I think she might catch on
who is she? I really hope you have an explanation cause either you think I'm fat or you're cheating on me
bitch so ugly she owes me an erection
the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I think she finds the idea of a naked fat man lying on the table and holding our butter offensive
Well I mean he is in a slightly seductive pose
I got really upset about missing him last night when I was demonstrating penis sizes of the people I've slept with using a tape measurer to my roommates
Also barcrawl friday. You ARE wearing a tiara
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
He's teaching me French for free and I'm giving him blowjobs. Win-win.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
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