My only options right now are Herpes, Gay, or Vanilla.
69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Im pretty sure by the fifth subway ride after going in circles the four times prior, we all just accepted that we werent making the concert and should instead enjoy our magical weed and tequila laced journey.
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
You're like my little fucked up version of the groundhog seeing its shadow, only it's boobs and warm weather.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I'm going to tell you something and I want no judgement because it's america day and I'm wearing an American flag bathing suit but...I woke up in a yard.
Randomize
