If that was your dad, he is hot
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
this wart on my finger ripped off while i was fingering this girl the other night. she thought she had gotten her period and started crying so i went with. its better for both of us that way
Fuck, operation next sex victim is on as soon as i get back. Do not sleep with that red head, nobody likes accidental ginger babies.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Note to all middle aged "I totally let myself go after childbirth" frumpy mothers: I do not dress this way for your husbands. Stop looking at me like that. It's not my fault.
I could write a book on how to barely get by in community college. I just took an online quiz on my phone, at the bar, 6 minutes before it was due.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
He's slurring his text. I didn't think that was possible.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
Just once, I'd like to make it to my first wedding anniversary for a change.
you hit your head on the sneeze guard and passed out at Pizza Hut they called the police
Randomize