yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
You were spooning my trash can and I had to crumble cookies on the floor by your face to get you to eat
So the girl in front of me was buying champagne too .. I wanted to be like "so are you celebrating clean test results too?"
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
No one parties like Jon. He once stole a cops hat, ran like the wind, partied all night with it, and dropped it off at the station the next day with a box of donuts as an appology.
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
I've decided to have sex with him one more time to make sure I don't like him
Remember the random guy who licked my face when we were at the bar the other night?
Yeah. His name is Andrew. We just met
Randomize
