I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
im six kinds of drunk right now
You know im sick of people that are still obsessed w obama. that was sooooo last year
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
His was the first dick to ever be in my mouth... Of course I'm going to the wedding.
Fun Fact: The stage were about to graduate on is where we once drove a van and kidnapped someone.
Fun Fact 2: My parents are sitting by the bushes I peed in this weekend.
I woke up this morning to my phone notebook open and written was "reasons why I'm a whore in chronological order" then it listed everybody I've had sex with in the past five months.
I really couldn't tell if she was disgusted with the fact that I yacked on her shoes, or if she was about to do the same to me.
i mean, some people chug beer and some people chug hard liquor. some people have good ideas and some people have bad ideas. it's all about perspective.
#1 benefit of having an equality sticker on my car: some girl flashed me while i was driving home
he ate me out like he was chugging a beer.
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
Randomize