Tequila shots with cinnamon and orange write it down before I forget
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He said I was almost as good as the wheel chair sex he had the night before. Apparently I just cant compete with 4 wheels
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
I don't know whether to call the hospital or call the prison first.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
Do you remember using the vicegrip to demonstrate how wide your penis is?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's an appropriate engagement gift for the girl that's marrying your brother's Tuesday night hookup? Cause all I can think of is vodka and Kleenex.
Hey I'm at the gym and I need your personal trainer help. Also can you send me that picture of me eating a sausage. I want to post it on instgram.
I am getting off work an hour early just to watch you drink. Never let it be said that I don't love you.
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
Nana added me on facebook...i think i'll have to call her and warn her about my lifestyle before i confirm her as a friend.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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