I'm in that akward stage between jailbait and cougar
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
we drove through mcdonalds and ordered everything on the dollar menu. We told the workers that were making Super Size Me 2, drove away without paying and told them to bill our producer.
I'm going to knit you a pair of furry handcuffs. And you said that knitting class was dumb.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Did they have a limo or was i just stoned?
i'm not entirely sure that 'not getting kicked out of the bar until it got dark' really classifies as 'doing better'
I just need to repress my desire to share my impressive chugging abilities with the world and I won't black out so much
He practically cut off his thumb and she offered him a tampon to stop the bleeding
Worse than that. I caught my roommate jerking off to a topless stripper in gta 5.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
really enjoying the fact I don't remember how the staff party ended. feel like I need to shame drink today
feel at noon?
Randomize
