What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
Strippers tramp stamp says "mom"
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I seem to remember you being very disappointed that drinking Michelob Ultra didn't give you magic powers.
I have a beer in one hand and a slim fast in another. It's another one of those wednesday nights.
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Because once my penis is in motion, it stays in motion unless another force acts upon it.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
I left when you were using your mug to lay on the street and ask for spare change
It's whatever. Titanic is about to be on and we have wine, which is basically crying juice. Leo, Kate, and I will be having a lovely, pants free evening.
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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