No subtext here. People are naked.
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
We hooked up with his aunt passed out next to us. It was just like old times.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
The guy I woke up with is wearing the same nailpolish as me...I need to stop drinking
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
You seemed underwhelmed by my smooth, smooth ass
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
whatever. i just wanna get "forget my own name" wasted
no. you need to know your name so people know where to return you when you get lost.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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