Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
I know it should be off bounds, but can this be the chick we all sleep with at some point? I can write it off as drunken mistake, you all just have to come up with equally good excuses
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
well i did drunkenly flip his snowmobile going 90, so i can kind of see why hes mad
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Going through my purse trying to find money for this cab but all I keep pulling out if chicken from my burrito o ate an hour ago. Help?
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
I am pretty great at coffee and mistakes
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
He gave his liver a pep talk before the vodka chugging started
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