need another drink. this is the easiest way
he just referred to himself as the billy mays of his frat.. heres how to order
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
There's a girl in my class named "La-a" pronouced "Luh Dash uh" I hate everyone
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
Honestly, where the fuck is osama bin laden?
I just made a steamroller out of a christmas ornament. I feel so festive.
I've never played a more sexually-tense game of Uno in my life.
Definitely need to find a less healthy bootycalls. All this bitch got in her fridge is feta, English muffins and wheat grass. What the fuck can I make with that???
Found 2 Coors, problem solved.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
This morning i put band aids over my nipples bc i was too lazy to put on a bra. Think I've reached a new low.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
Randomize
