The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
I'll have my TA grade the tests, she needs something to do anyway. Wanna race to the bar on segways?
I am currently explaining what double penetration is to the bridesmaid I hooked up with at my cousin's wedding. This is my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
I mean, I love her. But not "I'll have a threesome with her." Type of love.
Honestly, if you can handle putting socks on you can handle a condom.
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Could we try to replay the decision making process whereby only you and I bought and drank a keg this weekend? Because there were some fundamental flaws!
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
What's a really polite way of saying "you have gravely overestimated the value of your vagina?"
Randomize