The last thing I remeber was convincing you to hide in the fridge, and then taking everything out and you not fitting.
I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
i was sitting in the back seat of her car with her boyfriend while she was driving. it was pretty awkward, but i dont think "so my dick's been in your girl's mouth too" was a good ice breaker
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
He's only a little bit crosseyed.
I think this is one situation where "a little bit" doesn't mean much.
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Tonight when I'm getting a bj from a stripper I'm gonna imagine it's you bobbing down there
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
First contact since we had sex and it's to get my HBO password. I sure pick winners huh
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Im goin to jail bro ill talk to u sun
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