I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
I just saw a man with a full beard and frosted tips
there is no god
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Are you high?
The snorkel mask makes that pretty clear
I shouldn't be that hard, but i cant exactly put "a guy to tie me up and fuck me and then brush my hair" in my dating profile
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
I just looked down and realized I was walking around in briefs and a ninja turtle shirt; and for a second, I thought I was 8 again... Weird...
he had hair everywhere except his balls
The moral of the story is this:the last shot of the night is always a mistake
Just woke up to the cat unconscious on my stomach, his face between my tits, purring to bring down the walls. I'm endeared and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
