At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Just saw a hooker eating a pastrami sandwich walking down beach blvd blowing kisses to traffic. My day = made
i spilled a box of white cheddar cheezits on the bathroom floor about 2 days ago. when i went back to the house he yelled at me from the bathroom: "THANKS FOR THE CHEEZITS, I'll ALWAYS HAVE A SNACK FOR WHEN IM SHITTING NOW!"
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
Turns out that Irishman put my panties under his pillow afterward. Thanks?
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
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