I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
You cant give me a fifth of god damn jim beam and expect me not to cheat on my gf.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
I WANT TO JUMP IN TO A VOLCANO
Just fantasized about my boss's fingers in a meeting. I desperately need to get some.
Russell is lonely. He needs a companion.
You're lucky you have a monster cock or most people may just laugh at your penis' nickname.
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
you asked how they got the microwave in the air. we had to explain three times that it was mounted there until you finally feel asleep
Randomize