i just pissed myself at work. maybe they'll buy the old coffee spill trick
omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
If Andre Agassi did Crystal Meth, what was John McEnroe doing?
I had a dream that I had 21 friend requests. it was the best day
I feel like I would bang a guy with a dick piercing just to say I have...like climbing a huge mountain or somethig
just got hammed at grandma and grampas 30th aniversary bash .. from the looks i was getting im guessing i wont be seeing an inheritance ...
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
Drunk me spoon fed everyone baby food last night.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I would just like to say that I had morning sex today to the Hamilton soundtrack. So.
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
Randomize
