they ran out of cups so I just drank out of a cowbell.
She made a guy cry in the bar. I will have her, oh yes, I will have her..
He went down on me in his escalade and his dick is bigger than my forearm. I'm never going back to white guys.
Just realized the fur coat I am wearing to the wedding is the one I had sex with the groom in
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
She made out with the kickboxers bf. She was just asking to get kicked in the head. In the middle of the bar.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry you felt insulted last night let me rub your butt in remorse
Nothing warms my heart more than the sight of a naked hockey player in my bed.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
Help. I am eating nachos. But I'm with some guy. I need help. I don't know where I am. The nachos were so good. I'll bring them but help me.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
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