Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
Farmville is her only friend.
if you really think there are plastic pots safe for the stove i fear for your future landlords.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
3pm strippers are depressing
The trashcan full of everclear punch caught on fire...you should probably come home now.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
Randomize